Saturday, February 22, 2014

How We Are (Not How We Will Be)

I knew, better than anyone else, that someone like you could never stay in one place for too long. This house, this room, this grave, was always too small. After the tenth time, I stopped calling the police. I got used to coming home to find you missing. No note, no letter. No sign to reassure me that you were real and I had not just spent the last decade dreaming. You always found your way back home though, missing tea, peanut butter, the warm press of your shoulder against mine. And I would forgive you, because I am helpless to do anything else. Even though it might have been 6 months since we last spoke, I would card my fingers through your hair, trembling, because I will never be enough for you. This world will not be enough for you.


12 comments:

  1. That's such a sad story :(
    Big hug my dear!

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  2. Beautiful paragraph. I've known people like who you describe- they're hard to hang onto and hard to let go of all at once.

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  3. I can't have people like that around me because I'm just like them. Beautifully written.

    /Avy

    http://mymotherfuckedmickjagger.blogspot.com

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  4. Oh, those pictures are so freaking awesome! Love it, girl :)

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  5. Beautiful pictures, Liz, especially the middle one!

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  6. oh liz, you are enough & you are beautiful & really really important. i hope that person realizes this.
    iloveyou.

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  7. Sometimes, when I read your words, I have to ask myself, "Real? Or not real?" Regardless, you are telling stories. And this story, this particular one, is a heartbreaking one. It reminds me of the movie "Love Actually," in which little Sam says, "Worse than the total agony of being in love?" Sure, "Love Actually" is a happy movie. A comfort movie. But Sam's words are true; love makes us both happy and full of suffering. Sometimes, we don't let go of what we should. And, sometimes, we can't.

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  8. a sad story and beautiful pictures ...

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  9. This feels too perfect to be a diary, but too accurate to be a book. Reading it reminds me of Never Let Me Go. It feels so real, I'm not sure if it is real. If I knew someone who felt this way I would offer them my favorite snack. I like to mix a mashed up banana with pure cocoa powder until it is the consistency of chocolate pudding, and then I might heat it up if I feel like it. Sometimes I add in some peanut butter too. It wouldn't really help anything, but at least they wouldn't be hungry anymore.

    Glitterous Clitoris

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