Friday, May 31, 2013

Heartbreak Hotel

We left for the Midwest when I was 18 and you were 17. We drove 800 miles to St. Louis because we were looking for escape and St. Louis seemed to be that kind of sleepy city you dream about on the bus ride home. The kind of city where you could uninvent yourself and fade quietly into obscurity. So we wound up living that summer in cheap hotels off the highway, blowing kisses at the boys in red convertibles and soaking up sun on the rooftop. Mostly though, we slept. From sunrise to moonrise, living off of tea, toast, drive-in corn-dogs, and diner coffee. We laughed a lot, got into trouble, flirted shamelessly, and talked and talked and talked. And when we got tired of the green lawns and white picket fences, we drove somewhere else. There were car boot flea markets and fresh summer watermelon and the best BBQ on this side of the Mississippi.

 It wasn't a bad life. Running away from the past, running away from the future, running, until the only thing you can focus on is how to keep breathing. But then it was August, and then one day, I woke up alone. The sun was beginning to set and there was a sweet summer breeze sauntering through the open balcony. As expected, the car was gone, along with all your things, except for a white envelope perched on the edge of the bed. I never got a chance to read your letter because the next morning, I was bound for a train to Sacramento. And as the flat expanse of desert unfolded outside my window, I thought about the last words you said to me: This is a dream you know, just a dream, just a dream. But god, I hope I never have to wake up.


13 comments:

  1. perfect and heartbreaking. i love your writing so.

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  2. Love the photographs so much... not to mention the brilliant way you write! xx

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  3. You are such a brilliant writer! So inspiring I can't even handle it sometimes.
    xx

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  4. Beautiful and moving words as always :)
    Oh, this sort of reminded me of a music video from Lana Del Rey, I can't get enough of her and you!

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  5. you are amzing, your words and images are amazing, i am happy aover and over gain that i found you in the ocean of irrelevance that is blogger!

    xxx

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  6. this is so beautiful! it makes me want to run away and spend a whole summer relaxing and hanging out somewhere beautiful and quite and warm. it's a shame nothing can last forever.

    little henry lee

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  7. I love it Liz ! Roadtrips are the best :)

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  8. The first and last photo - just wow, I absolutely love them. I'm also enjoying the boy and girl storyline.

    How have you been?

    xx

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  9. A road trip sounds amazing to me right now. I love motels, haha not very high end but I find them oddly fun to stay in.

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    Replies
    1. Same here. I am such a cheap bum, srsly. I also find that motels have way more personality than hotels =)

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